Tim Worstall

Amazon.co.uk: Idiot Wankers

God these people annoy me. Amazon.co.uk.

I made on order on May 10th. They say they sent it on 17 July (how’s that for service, eh?). They now send me an email today saying that they can’t deliver it.

No thought of, while they were having problems, dropping me an email and asking if I can help their delivery guy or anything, oooooh, no. That would be complex, wouldn’t it.

So they’ve credited my account with the value of the order.

So if they can’t deliver to me what fucking good is that to me?

Note that they won’t actually give my money back. Just let me order more things they’re too idiot wankerish to be able to deliver. Plus, their wankeriffic "contact us" pages seem not to work in Firefox.

Can someone remind me how people this bloody appalling managed to become a huge international business?

In

9 responses

  1. Thom Avatar
    Thom

    I know exactly what you mean; I ordered a gift for a friend’s child a few months back and it took over 4 weeks for them to tell me they had trouble delivering it and then a further 3 weeks, along with a redelivery of a book (big book of labour sleeze) they had lost in the post, arriving a good month and a half after the childs birthday.
    Still she couldn’t complain; I always found late brithday presents that I wasn’t expecting to be quite a nice surprise!
    Grief Amazon must be haemorhaging money though? Play.com gets the job done for free, at a saving and in good time (dont work for them by the way – have used them for years and never had a problem!)

    Reply
  2. Tim Almond Avatar
    Tim Almond

    “Can someone remind me how people this bloody appalling managed to become a huge international business?”
    Because for most people, price matters more than service when it comes to CDs or DVDs.
    Pay the price for personal service, or accept that you won’t have it if something goes wrong. You can’t have both.

    Reply
  3. Andrew Paterson Avatar
    Andrew Paterson

    Tried http://www.play.com Tim? Never had much in the way of a problem with them and they’re pretty cheap.
    Tim adds: I only ever use Amazon because I get gift certificates!

    Reply
  4. Jay Stranahan Avatar
    Jay Stranahan

    Uh… I’ve had the same thing happen twice with the *original* Amazon.com, here in the States. I got an email informing me it was undeliverable (for whatever mysterious reason), then less than a week later got another informing my my money had been refunded electronically. No sweat.
    Does it have to do with the settings on your account…? Or does Amazon’s UK division simply suck?

    Reply
  5. Matthew Avatar
    Matthew

    Surely if you can do better you should set up your own online bookshop and it would draw customers away from Amazon? Beat writing those paid-for-spots, I think.
    Tim adds: Lessee….I could try to raise billions and compete….or I could stay in my little bubble where I make a good living from scandium and a bit more from writing….and those paid for spots (all 6 a month!) pay the mortgage.
    You know, I think my utility is maximised by frequenting physical bookshops here.

    Reply
  6. Bob B Avatar
    Bob B

    I have to admit that my personal experience is mostly favourable, at least over the last year or so, and that I find the lower prices, compared with retail stores and even supermarkets, appealing.
    Problems of a few years back were largely down to delivery problems, mostly because of the Royal Mail, but a couple of months some deliveries arrived before the Amazon email advising of dispatch and that stoked memories of the past when some parcels just disappeared in the post. However, there have been several cases where books advertised as available on the website – albeit usually with some caveat about relatively long delivery waits – turn out not to be available at all.

    Reply
  7. Bob B Avatar
    Bob B

    I have to admit that my personal experience is mostly favourable, at least over the last year or so, and that I find the lower prices, compared with retail stores and even supermarkets, appealing.
    Problems of a few years back were largely down to delivery problems, mostly because of the Royal Mail, but a couple of months some deliveries arrived before the Amazon email advising of dispatch and that stoked memories of the past when some parcels just disappeared in the post. However, there have been several cases where books advertised as available on the website – albeit usually with some caveat about relatively long delivery waits – turn out not to be available at all.

    Reply
  8. Ian Bennett Avatar
    Ian Bennett

    My experience is not so much that Amazon suck but that the courier that use happens to be utterly useless. They can only deliver during office hours, which happens to be when I’m at work. They can specify a day when they might attempt to deliver, but not a time, so I need to take a whole day off work and even then they might not turn up. As an alternative, I can drive 20 miles to their warehouse and collect the parcel myself but, again, only during office hours, so there’s another half-day off work.
    Or I can tell them to stuff it and buy somewhere else. (Except that the ‘telling’ part is somewhat rhetorical as it appears to be impossible to contact them.)

    Reply
  9. Pete Avatar
    Pete

    I ring up my local bookshop, order a book, and pick up and pay for the it when they’ve informed me they have it. No internet problems, no unanswered emails, no returning the wrong book, no need to chase refunds, no driving miles to a post office depot in Stockport or Manchester to pick the thing up if I’m out when they deliver. When I move to a remote Scottish island I might just start using amazon to buy books.

    Reply

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